Storyboards, Makeup and Cleaning

It was lovely outside today.  I can feel spring in the air.  The urge to runaway to the beach on some hot tropical location is starting to lesson a little bit.  However, whenever life gets a bit too stressful or the weather gets a bit too cold, my feet start to itch and i want to runaway to lovely beach somewhere warm.  

Today, i worked on cleaning my room- mainly deciding what could stay out and what needed to be put away from little hands.  

I went to CNM to pick up my official transcript then i dropped it off at UNM.  I am planning on going back to UNM this summer to work on finishing my degree (what that degree is going to be in is changed every few days).  I really like most things about the film business but everything about the adoption has made me want to work on something that will have a positive impact on society.  I know, i know, film can have a positive impact too but it just doesn't seem like enough for me.  I plan on working hard this semester and trying to get into Local 480- the film union here in NM- so that i can get some jobs but i also plan on going back to UNM.  Plus, I miss writing papers and taking tests- i know that is weird but i miss the challenge that school brings!

I made up a list of makeup supplies for my class.  Our kit was stolen/misplaced at the end of last semester so a new kit needs to be ordered.  I was asked to figure out what i have in my kit and anything i might be dreaming of getting.  

I worked on getting things ready for a meeting with the director of a commercial.  I am meeting with him tomorrow to tweak the storyboard for the commercial a bit.  

Tonight Mom and I are going to go through the medicines we had in our kitchen cabinet and move them to a locked cabinet.  We need to lock away any cleaning chemicals so that the kids cannot get into them.  The knives also need to be relocated into a safer place.  

There are so many things we have to do before the kids come on Thursday.  Each day brings about a new list of things to do.  

One more hour until we call the kids for our nightly talk.  I love hearing their voices but i have to admit that sometimes i cannot understand what they are saying.  I guess that will come with time.  I hope it will at least!

work work work

OK so new news:  We have been up to see the kids twice now.  They are a handful but they have captured my heart.  I love them more than words can express.  I feel like a big sister but also sort of like a new mom too.  I would do anything to make sure these kids are kept safe from harm.  

However, just because i love them doesn't mean i always like them.  At times i feel resentful of them changing my life in such a huge way.  I even feel resentful of them making me fall in love with them.  They have caused me to

 open myself up in a way I haven't ever 

done.  Its scary and I don't always like it.  I wouldn't change them coming into my life though.  I wouldn't want them to go anywhere else!  They are family.  They may not have been born into this family but none the less they are still family.  

The kids will not be coming to stay on the 29th as posted in the previous blog but they will be coming for a visit from thursday the 28th to saturday the 1st!  I am excited to show them around their new home but i kind of wish we had one more week to get ready.

We have been working extremely hard trying to get everything done.  

We are close but whether we will get everything finished before they

 come, i just don't know.  One of the 

major projects we did was to level out the back yard.  We had to breakdown the awning.  We had a contractor come in and build us a wall so that we could fill in the middle layer with dirt.  We ordered 9 cubic yards of dirt and carted it into the back yard.  That wasn't enough.  So we ordered another 15 cubic yards of dirt that day and carted it into the back yard.  One cubic yard of dirt is

 about equal to a ton of dirt.  So in total we hauled about 24 tons of dirt.  

I am so tired right now that I want to cry.  I would love a day simply to be lazy.  I am fighting getting the cold that is going around.  Mainly I think it is the shear exhaustion that is causing me to have a weakened immune sy

stem.  K had the nasty bug and I spent the last two weekends trapped in a car with him coughing out the lovely little germs.  Not his fault but fighting the germs and being utterly wiped has been making me feel like i am constantly fighting getting a cold.  I keep trying to go to bed early but end up staying up late.  I am so tired at the end of the day that i cannot get to sleep.  

Oh well it will get better.  Things will never be the same again but that would be boring right?   Who wants to be stuck doing the same things over and over again?   Hopefully I will start to adjust to the new busyness of life!  

So things have gone kind of crazy in our lives right now.  Instead of the month and a half or more that we were expecting before we take the kids home we are now going to be picking them up on Feb. 29th!  Tomorrow the family heads up to CO to meet with them for the first time.  I am really excited and terrified at the same time.  

We have sooooo much to do still!  

tonight we are going to work on writing letters/cards for each of the kids for everyday we are not there to leave their foster parents.   Mom is going to make them all baby blankets.  we picked out the material today--its really cute!  i will try and post pictures of them up soon.

I am so excited and frazzled at the same time that it is making it hard to even type.   I know that this is the best for the kids but it just feels like it is all happening so fast!  Of course, the poor kids don't even know that we are meeting them tomorrow and they have no idea that they will be coming home with us in two weeks.  I cannot even imagine how terrifying it must be for them.   Little Jacob was looking at our "life book" that we made for them and had tears falling down his cheeks.  He has memorized the book front to back but is so scared of leaving everything he knows.  As he said "I don't want to move again!" Who can blame him!  I am terrified of our lives changing so much and i have had a choice about the change- i have wanted the change.    

I will also try and finish the second part of "Adoption" in a bit.